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SHAFFER: Say no to high school class reunions

By Randi Shaffer on June 21, 2011 5:15 pm in Columns / 4 comments

 

I harbored an immense dislike for the majority of my high school graduating class.

So, when I got invited to an informal class reunion on Facebook, I let out a small laugh while swiftly clicking the “Not Attending” RSVP button.

I graduated with the class of 2007 from a small school in a small village with a “community feeling.”

The phrase “community feeling” meaning, of course, 70-something graduating teenagers who all knew way too much of each others’ business.

I spent first grade through senior year of high school in the same community education system, graduating with many of the same students I had first enrolled in elementary school with.

Throughout my 12 years of school, many of these students bullied me at worst and ignored me at best. Despite my four-year commitment to my school’s cheerleading team, I was still one of the awkward, unpopular students who spent lunch hour eating in the library.

The highlight of my high school career was the day it finally came to an end. I had been counting down the days until I was able to move out of the high school drama and onto CMU’s campus, a place where I was quickly able to make new friends and become actively involved with many organizations on campus.

So, why dwell on the past? I am one of those people who will probably never make an effort to go to a class reunion.

Not only that, class reunions are pointless in today’s technology-driven society.

I can use Facebook to check and see which classmates lost weight, gained weight, came out of the closet, had children or ended up in jail.

Those students who were friends in high school still get together post-high school to hang out.

Nothing has changed, aside from the fact that my classmates and I are all 21 now, and can get together in bars instead of barns.

If I showed up to one of these gatherings, it would more than likely be a repeat of high school for me — gossip and drama.

So, sorry, high school. When I said goodbye in June of 2007, I really and truly meant it.

 

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  • 66Chip

    I found this post a little sad.  Facebook is great, but there is nothing like getting together in person from time to time — and certainly determining who has lost weight or is in or out of the closet aren’t the primary reasons for doing so.  I came from a community very much like described (with some of the same negatives).  At least 2/3 of my classmates are scattered throughout the country and for the most part only our class reunions give us an opportunity to see each other.   And, as someone much older than the writer, I have found that as the years go by such opportunities become more and more cherished (even with the negative memories that haven’t gone away).  

  • 66Chip

    I found this post a little sad.  Facebook is great, but there is nothing like getting together in person from time to time — and certainly determining who has lost weight or is in or out of the closet aren’t the primary reasons for doing so.  I came from a community very much like described (with some of the same negatives).  At least 2/3 of my classmates are scattered throughout the country and for the most part only our class reunions give us an opportunity to see each other.   And, as someone much older than the writer, I have found that as the years go by such opportunities become more and more cherished (even with the negative memories that haven’t gone away).  

  • Eric

    I found the
    article inspiring and uplifting, but what would you expect from Randi’s father?
    I had an opportunity to witness first hand of the effects of the bullying Randi
    was forced to endure. In high school (as is still the case) Randi was a petite
    individual. Not only that, she was a “bit homely” (sorry Randi, but you were). It
    was a deadly combination that left Randi fair game for the bullies. I was busted
    up inside watching Randi trudge along through high school all the while thinking “just
    hang in there, things will work out.” As of now Randi has shed her “homeliness”
    and is a petite attractive young lady. She not only has drive, but a heart of
    gold. I feel sorry for the people who bullied Randi as they missed the
    opportunity to interact with a truly great individual. I totally understand the
    harsh words Randi has written regarding her high school graduating class. I
    believe that one day in the distant future Randi may attend one of her class
    reunions with her head held high- Time heals most wounds. In the end, Randi
    will be at the top of the pinnacle looking down. She will need to speak no
    words as her actions will reveal the real story: She is the better individual
    than the bullies in high school.

    -Randi’s proud father, Eric

  • chipskeptic

    I understand the feelings Randi is expressing.  High school is in many cases a nightmare of cliques’.  The point I would make is that 5 years is way too soon to have a reunion.  Classmates have not even figured out who they are yet or settled into a career.  The wounds are also way too fresh.  The 25th is a much better timeframe.