Student struggles to find gender neutral formal wear
South Lion sophomore Jamie Smet, Grand Rapids freshman Sydney Totten, and Dearborn Heights freshman Arial Cunningham model for Gardenia Bridal Shop at Dow Diamond in Midland, on Nov. 15, 2015. Mary Lewandowski | Staff Photographer
One day, a same sex couple entered Kelly Wilson's bridal shop in Midland. Like all of her customers, they were looking to find the perfect attire to be married in.
Wilson said they came across as both shy and embarrassed to talk about what they were looking for.
Troy sophomore Rachel Dean from Central Michigan University said Blue Gardenia Bridal is one of the only places that offer for the type of clothing she is looking for. Dean said she has tried searching for gender-neutral options on the internet. Although such places exist, shipping prices can add up. She is now set to model Wilson's new collection of gender-neutral formal wear.
“I’m a little bit on the shorter side so I’m in between boy’s and men’s clothing,” she said. “Guys have super bulky shoulders and (women) are more waist-shaped and curvy, so I have a lot of issues trying to figure out where to fit exactly.”
Although LGBTQ services employee Kai Niezgoda said the bridal shop is a nice gesture toward the LGBTQ+ community, they said eventually the marriage of same sex couples will become normalized.
“I just think that’s how capitalism works,” Neizgoda said. “There’s a market of people who buy a product, so it’s going to become tailored to fit the needs of those people.”
Niezgoda said the more important impact is the comfort LGBTQ+ couples feel when looking for wedding attire.
The idea of Dean modeling for the bridal shop started when Wilson's daughter, Sarah, brought up the predicament of how Dean, her sorority sister, was indecisive about how to dress for recruitment week for Greek Life at Central Michigan University.
During recruitment week, there are a series of five days when students who want to be admitted into a sorority are required to dress formally.
She said she was uncomfortable about the idea of recruitment week for her sorority, primarily because she is used to dressing more masculine, but the women in the sorority approached her and made it clear that it was acceptable for Rachel to wear whatever clothing made her feel comfortable, instead of a dress.
“I thought that was awesome," Dean said. "One night I wore a bow tie with some slacks, then on another night I wore a tie.”
Not long after, Sarah proposed that Dean be a model for her mother’s gender-neutral formal wear.
“Sarah told me her mom was thinking about having someone model for gender-neutral options and I told her I’d love to do that,” she said.
Wilson said when she told her father about providing gender-neutral formal wear, he asked if she was concerned about losing customers.
“I told him that’s not my population and it never was,” she said.
Besides offering gender-neutral clothes, Wilson said she also tries to cater to other minority populations. In Midland, there is a community of people with developmental disabilities. Some of these women come into the bridal shop and want the same experience as any other bride who is planning her wedding, she said. Many of them open up to her about their experiences at other bridal shops.
“They’re made uncomfortable or told not to come back, and that breaks my heart because this type of experience shouldn’t be taken away from you,” Wilson said.
Sarah said one thing Blue Gardenia Bridal Boutique tries to promote is comfort with who you are.
“Other shops put forth who they are and customers feel they need to adhere to those same standards,” Sarah said.
She said this pertains to all types of differences across the board: weight, height, cultural, ablest and age differences.
“It’s so rare and so sweet to find someone you love,” Wilson said. “Who am I to judge who you love and who loves you?”
