“Battlestar Galactica” has prepared me for life after advanced robots annihilate the vast majority of the human race.

Well, not really.

But the show is a remarkable depiction of people at their wit’s end. Beyond the robots and the intergalactic travel, “Battlestar” is a tale of survival and desperation – and the many horrible things we might do along the way.

This will be the worst column you will have ever read.

It will be full of appeals to authority, question-begging and blunt assertions. (Non sequitur!)

Think you can do better? Apply to Central Michigan Life.

I am looking for columnists to write weekly pieces for CM Life’s Voices page.

I wear shoes often and in many different situations.

Sometimes it’s a stylistic choice. Other times I select shoes that make me look dapper. This is because I am entirely self-absorbed.

But the primary reason I so often wear shoes is that my feet are weak.

So, we made it through 2008.

Sure, employers axed 2.6 million jobs, unemployment hit a 16-year record high and the financial sector went into an outright tailspin – but we made it.

What’s next? More pain, but also some cause for cheer.

At CMU

Tuition hits $350 per credit hour: For current freshmen, tuition is already $324 per credit hour – a 6.

I have severely self-destructive coffee-drinking habits.

It’s not only that I need coffee to wake up in the morning. That’s not the worst of it.

It’s that I have a horrid tendency to drink coffee to the point of becoming a jittery mess – especially when refills are easily accessible.