2008 Woodie Awards
The dinosaur was never funny
By: Three Dull Guys
Issue date: 4/4/08 Section: Voices
We've never seen a newspaper edition of the TV program "Intervention," but we're certain this is how it would go.
This letter comes to you from three comic actors and writers. For those familiar with us, we do not profess to be experts of comedy or hysterical people; rather, we are three competent beings with astute senses of humor. This letter comes to you only from seasoned consumers of comedy. From Steve Martin to Mad magazine to Van Wilder to, yes, Marmaduke, we appreciate elements in our culture designed to make us laugh.
Which brings us to this letter's purpose:
Mr. (Evan) Shaner, your dinosaur cartoons are not funny.
(Pre-Centrosaurus, they weren't that funny either, but we'll concede the point.) We fully understand that the CMU mascot, the Flying C, is terrible, but your assertion that an ass-kicking dinosaur should represent CMU for an undetermined reason is just as awful - as is its name. On top of your flimsy premise, embodying this mascot in human activities like teaching class or appearing as a guest on "Barney and Friends" is simply trite, not to mention that his (or her?) appearance would most likely hinder the education process.
This letter is a plea to make you stop drawing these cartoons. We hoped to elegantly phrase our plea similarly to how Reagan asked Gorbachev to tear down the Berlin Wall, but we wouldn't want to disrespect his widow or corpse by associating them with your dino drawings. You can of course continue crafting your cutting-edge social commentary and explore hard-hitting issues like how it snows during the winter, why potholes are bad and why people like days off, but you need to stop Centrosaurus cartoons. You even acknowledged this on Monday; your own Snap Shots From College featured a character commenting on your affinity for extinct, prehistoric mascots in CM Life.
This intervention wouldn't be complete if we didn't offer some sort of aid or advice. Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be some sort of rehab for cartoonists (although we wouldn't be surprised), but there are dozens of other comic strips published daily in newspapers across the country. An entire industry of day-to-day calendars exists for the very purpose of publishing daily one-panel cartoons. We ask you to read a Far Side. A Doonesbury. A Bizarro. Even a Garfield, for God's sake. You know what you won't find in any of those comics? Recurring dinosaur mascots.
Our offer? We are willing to donate up to (but not exceeding) 50 cents toward the purchase of a daily newspaper of your choice. We don't recommend USA Today (as is has no comics section) but the Detroit Free Press and others are readily available. (No, we will not pay for a Sunday edition, although we would strongly advise investing in one.) You can pick up the check at our next comedy show on Gentle Friday (April 25) in The Platform theatre at 9 p.m. or 11 p.m.
We look forward to seeing you.
This letter comes to you from three comic actors and writers. For those familiar with us, we do not profess to be experts of comedy or hysterical people; rather, we are three competent beings with astute senses of humor. This letter comes to you only from seasoned consumers of comedy. From Steve Martin to Mad magazine to Van Wilder to, yes, Marmaduke, we appreciate elements in our culture designed to make us laugh.
Which brings us to this letter's purpose:
Mr. (Evan) Shaner, your dinosaur cartoons are not funny.
(Pre-Centrosaurus, they weren't that funny either, but we'll concede the point.) We fully understand that the CMU mascot, the Flying C, is terrible, but your assertion that an ass-kicking dinosaur should represent CMU for an undetermined reason is just as awful - as is its name. On top of your flimsy premise, embodying this mascot in human activities like teaching class or appearing as a guest on "Barney and Friends" is simply trite, not to mention that his (or her?) appearance would most likely hinder the education process.
This letter is a plea to make you stop drawing these cartoons. We hoped to elegantly phrase our plea similarly to how Reagan asked Gorbachev to tear down the Berlin Wall, but we wouldn't want to disrespect his widow or corpse by associating them with your dino drawings. You can of course continue crafting your cutting-edge social commentary and explore hard-hitting issues like how it snows during the winter, why potholes are bad and why people like days off, but you need to stop Centrosaurus cartoons. You even acknowledged this on Monday; your own Snap Shots From College featured a character commenting on your affinity for extinct, prehistoric mascots in CM Life.
This intervention wouldn't be complete if we didn't offer some sort of aid or advice. Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be some sort of rehab for cartoonists (although we wouldn't be surprised), but there are dozens of other comic strips published daily in newspapers across the country. An entire industry of day-to-day calendars exists for the very purpose of publishing daily one-panel cartoons. We ask you to read a Far Side. A Doonesbury. A Bizarro. Even a Garfield, for God's sake. You know what you won't find in any of those comics? Recurring dinosaur mascots.
Our offer? We are willing to donate up to (but not exceeding) 50 cents toward the purchase of a daily newspaper of your choice. We don't recommend USA Today (as is has no comics section) but the Detroit Free Press and others are readily available. (No, we will not pay for a Sunday edition, although we would strongly advise investing in one.) You can pick up the check at our next comedy show on Gentle Friday (April 25) in The Platform theatre at 9 p.m. or 11 p.m.
We look forward to seeing you.
Viewing Comments 1 - 6 of 6
Kati
posted 4/04/08 @ 8:22 AM EST
Oh come one, the dinosaur was not that bad. I will admit I'm ready for a new topic, but I didn't lose any sleep over the dinorsaur. It even made me giggle. (Continued…)
Theodore
posted 4/04/08 @ 11:12 AM EST
Wow. I'm amazed that these people are so offended by a cartoon. I guess the easy thing to do would be just to not look at Mr. Shaner's cartoons. Instead though, these three gents decided to write an irritatingly pretentious letter to the editor full of schoolyard bully-style personal jabs. (Continued…)
Joe
posted 4/04/08 @ 5:57 PM EST
A.) The Centrosaurus was a real dinosaur. I thought that even a CMU student would take the time to Wikipedia something before writing about it.
B.) This letter seems like some sort of desperate plea to bring attention to your show. (Continued…)
Laura Tanner
posted 4/04/08 @ 8:00 PM EST
Three Dull Guys, you really live up to your name. Matt, you seemed like such a great guy. Jaded already? The good thing about being a cartoonist is you're used to people throwing verbal paper airplanes at you. (Continued…)
Teh Troll
posted 4/06/08 @ 2:41 PM EST
Damn Evan....how do you manage to walk with these haters hanging off of you trying to weigh you down?
John McKlausken
posted 4/07/08 @ 3:56 PM EST
Greg (and I know that this is Greg because I can actually SMELL the bridges being burned),
Don't be a hater. And, if you're going to post something under your comedy troupe's name, you could at least have thrown a few jokes in there. (Continued…)
Post a Comment