At least, that’s what reassures me, the hope that I’m not alone.

Every day, I’m filled with anxiety over what to do next; I’ve flirted with attending graduate school, considered internships and of course, the official jump into adulthood: A real job.

Right now, I’m juggling an internship plus being a full-time student.

I feel like I’ve got the best of both worlds. I’m working at a real newspaper, which, aside from my job title, is a “real,” grown-up job — I need to be to work at 8 a.m. every morning and attend meetings, and jeans are sadly unacceptable.

I also have classes two days a week. For that, I feel quite fortunate. In a way, I get to have a suspended adolescence.

But it’s also filled with uncertainty. My friends don’t think of me as a real student or peer, my co-workers don’t see me as a colleague.

This uncertainty isn’t anything all undergraduates don’t eventually face, but, like most 20-somethings, I can’t help but feel like it’s so much worse because it’s happening to ME.

I have so much ambition and I want to do great things. I want to cover the White House by the arbitrary age of 30 and I want to continue my education. There’s so much I want to do, that choosing just one thing may be my actual dilemma here.

I’m not quite sure if I’m ready to choose yet.

Making things worse is the fact that moving on from the comfortable safety net of college (and by extension, my youth) is FREAKING ME OUT.

I admittedly suffer from a bit of Peter Pan syndrome. I’m excited for my future, but very, very nervous about leaving what is safe and home to me. I don’t quite want to grow up.

Anyone who knows me knows I’ve not loved every minute, or every thing about attending Central Michigan University. But moving on is proving to be an emotional and difficult undertaking.

Again, I suspect nearly everyone at the cusp of graduation is experiencing the same thing. And once that threshold is crossed, everything will be sensational. I’m sure of it.

But until then, I expect to continue waking up sick to my stomach, desperately trying to cling to my youth.

As terrified as I may be, in a way, it’s also exciting. Even at 23, I’m still young, and upon graduation, I will have every opportunity waiting for me.

So if it’s graduate school, moving to Washington or traveling, I’m lucky that I can truly do whatever it is I want.

It’s figuring it out that will be the ultimate, albeit exciting, challenge.

CMU stopped having a summer ceremony and began combining it with the December ceremony in 2004.

“We haven’t had one for a few years now,” said Assistant Registrar Barbara Lindley. “I think it was to cut costs.”

Lindley said students are informed of this decision a year in advance. CMU mails commencement information and diplomas to students in August.

“They’re well aware of their invitation,” she said. “Many of them do come back to walk.”

Ada senior Kassandra Hanrahan said even though she’s graduating this summer, she won’t come return in December.

“I live far enough away that I won’t be coming back,” she said. “If I was in Mount Pleasant I would probably do it … It’s more or less my parents are disappointed, since they wanted to see me walk.”

Grand Blanc senior Korri St. Clair said she is not sure whether or not she will return to walk in the December commencement story pending her end-of-summer graduation.

She said like Hanrahan, if she were to walk, she would do it for her parents.

St. Clair said she is not too happy about the lack of summer commencement ceremony.

“I think it would be nice for all summer graduates to be acknowledged at the time we actually graduate,” she said. “The end of summer still has nice weather and to be honest if I wanted to walk on ice in heels and freeze in a gown — I would have graduated in December.”

The ‘Satisfactory Progress Policy’ changes include credit hours taken to complete a degree, a required GPA level and a required percentage of attempted credits completed.

“This concerns students who are taking a timely manner to finish their degree,” said Diane Fleming, associate director of client services for the Office of Scholarships and Financial Aid. “Many schools had students who were attending with no progress toward their degree.”

Fleming said that the federal law was enacted to prevent “professional students” from taking advantage of the system.

Students will now have to complete their degree requirements within 150 percent of the minimum credit hours required to complete their entire program of study to remain eligible for financial aid.

If students meet their credit limit without completing their degree, they will be denied federal financial aid and state aid at the student level.

Undergraduate students must maintain a cumulative GPA of 2.0 and graduate students must have a cumulative GPA of 3.0.  All students must complete 67 percent of all credits attempted each semester.

The changes will apply to federal grants, federal work-study, federal loans, the Federal Perkins Loan, CMU grants and Michigan’s Tuition Incentive Program.

Students who do not meet the new policy will have one semester to use financial aid before any restrictions are implemented. Students will remain suspended until they meet the new criteria, Fleming said.

“When students get closer to their credit limits and after they are placed on a warning status they will be required to complete a financial-literacy counseling program online,” Fleming said.

Harsens Island senior Kelly DeBoyer said she thinks the new restrictions are a good idea.

“I can see how some people could get upset about it,” she said. “But I have to use financial aid and I think changes like this help to reward students who work hard and aren’t using the system.”

Gowen sophomore Stacey Freeman agreed with the minimum GPA rule, but was unsure of the rest of the changes.

“I can understand the minimum GPA rule because they’re not paying for you to party, they’re paying for school,” Freeman said.

As I am sitting here in my pajamas, not having to go to anymore classes for the rest of my life. A foreign notion to me still.

As a graduating senior, I am declaring this column a pseudo-graduation speech. An informal goodbye letter to CMU, my peers and whoever else decides to read this. Thankfully, you can’t see me tearing up.

In writing this, I had the opportunity to wax eloquently about my past endeavors, groups I’ve lead, awards I’ve won and lifelong friendships I’ve made.

But I won’t do that. I want to talk about how even as a senior, I get scared at times. Asking the universal question most 20-something-year-olds want to know: “Am I prepared for the real world?”

It seems that my adulthood snuck up on me quickly and that complete feeling of “a true adult” never really sinks in like it does in the movies.

But there are no cameras. It is my life. And since I stepped through the maroon and gold doors, I knew I would be leaving faster than I came here three years ago as a transfer student.

I can tell I have grown up in these short years but there is still so much I want to do. My classes have only created a deeper desire in me to be a lifelong student.

In my cultural anthropology class, I learned about the study of present-day human cultures while discovering what I love, turning this class into my minor. The little kid in me still wants to discover the world through a paper-towel telescope lens.

In my cultures of Africa class, I learned new routes my ancestors have gone through to get me to where I am today.

Even in French I learned to love the intricacies of a new language, and love their cheese.

But outside of the classroom I received at least 50 percent of my education.

Learning about cultures from places I never thought about, covering events that still leave me scratching my head, but I’m thankful I was able to experience it. And then there was connecting with a community such as Mount Pleasant where I could call home. I have learned that being a senior isn’t about being finished, but just starting. Being a real adult with bills and an education I will never take for granted.

Henry David Thoreau once said “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.”

Since I have come to CMU I have lived and imagined so much within this campus. I won’t forget my dreams and I will go forth with confidence.

Goodbye CMU. You taught me well.

But then, life happened: I had a rough sophomore year, which resulted in me taking two years off from the Mount Pleasant campus. When I arrived back last fall, I was fully prepared to be done by the summer.

For everything to go according to plan, I would graduate in December by taking summer classes.

And then Friday, I found out two classes crucial to my on-time graduation were canceled because of lack of enrollment.

(Insert record needle screech here).

I wasn’t actually planning on being on campus this fall semester. I was fortunate enough to be offered a full-time internship and had hoped to devote most of my efforts to being the best intern a girl could be.

I’m not even sure if it’s humanly possible to take three classes while working full-time, which I will need to do to adhere to my newly-revised graduation plan.

In addition, there are fiscal pressures: this summer is my last chance to take classes under the soon-to-be-defunct CMU Promise. Pushing classes off to the fall will result in an additional $100 a credit hour — or $1,200 a semester.

Finally, the professor teaching one of the classes, who is a personal favorite, is on sabbatical next fall. This summer is my absolute last shot in taking a class with him.

So I’m left with two options: first, I could try a semester that seems like a suicide mission, or I could postpone graduation until the spring of 2012 — nearly a full year after I had expected to be out of this place. Neither feels particularly alluring.

My two-year detour was my own fault, but I had fully expected to be done with college at 23. My friends from high school all finished college in four years and have moved on to graduate school and “grown-up” jobs, yet I’m putzing around in Mount Pleasant for an extra two years? On top of everything else, it’s a blow to my self-esteem.

I understand and respect the financial responsibilities of the university, and it’s probably not practical to have a class with only 5 people.

But this is an educational institution. What is our first goal; to educate students, or maintain a profit? A small class allows for an incredible one-on-one learning experience, even more beneficial than in a standard class size. And that’s what we’re here for, right?

I know I’m not alone in this situation. So to whomever makes these decisions, I imagine department chairs and deans, I urge you to be especially generous when considering which classes are offered this summer.

I’ve had a wonderfully enriching undergraduate experience at CMU. I just need it to be over already.

The speakers for the May graduation ceremony were approved for honorary doctorate degrees during the Central Michigan University Board of Trustees meeting last week.

Undergraduate commencement at the 9:30 a.m., 1:30 p.m. and 5 p.m. ceremonies on May 7 will feature William F. Pickard, chairman and CEO of Global Automotive Alliance; Lizabeth Ardisana, principal owner of ASG Renaissance; and Michael J. Farrell, president of MacDonald Women’s Hospital and Rainbow Babies and Children’s Hospital in Ohio, respectively. Fred H. Bess, president and CEO of the Henry Ford Health System, will speak at the 4 p.m. doctoral ceremony on May 6.

Each of the ceremonies will take place at the Events Center.

“Everyone involved with commencement planning is excited to showcase the beautiful Events Center, which will provide a comfortable atmosphere for the graduates’ families and friends,” commencement coordinator Sharon Russell said in an email.

Russell said University President George Ross selects commencement speakers, but receives input from the university community before making a final selection.

“Anyone, including students, can nominate a potential speaker by submitting biographical information to the president’s office,” Russell said. “Speakers were chosen because of the success they enjoyed throughout their careers and to share life information and provide motivation and inspiration to the graduates as they pursue their own careers or continued education.”

The May ceremonies are planned to see 3,574 total graduates walk. Each received six tickets for his or her ceremony.

Pickard directs the entrepreneurial program at Alabama State University and is a former University of Michigan adjunct professor.

He said he attended Western Michigan University for his undergraduate studies and is familiar with the “great history of the Chips.”

“I was asked to come up and reflect on my business perspective of the world,” Pickard said.

He said his speech will address globalization, diversity and integrity.

“You must understand the entrepreneurial mindset,” Pickard said.

The ceremonies will be available through a livestream at the CMU website.

Weber Schulz, a Midland senior, said he does not plan to attend his commencement next month.

“I don’t see the point,” Schulz said. “It’s another milestone, but I don’t feel like coughing up $50 for a cap and gown to watch people walk.”

Deckerville alumna Ashley Grabitz said she participated in her 2009 ceremony because  it was significant to her family as a “rite of passage.”

The speaker at the ceremony was a professor, she said, but does not really recall his speech.

“At that point, you’ve spent four years working toward it,” Grabitz said. “You’re anxious and ready to move on.”

Fifty-nine percent of CMU students will complete their bachelor’s degrees in seven years, according to documents from the Office of Institutional Research.

“In a perfect world … 100 percent of our students would graduate in four years,” said Provost E. Gary Shapiro. “But we recognize that as unrealistic.”

The data is based on students who began their academic careers at CMU from 2001 to 2005. The amount has risen since 1990.

The number reflects a nationwide trend of graduation rates modestly increasing, according to a survey of 1,400 schools by the Chronicle of Higher Education.

Shapiro said most of the university’s programs require students take about 31 credit hours annually to reach 124 credits to graduate in four years.

He said some programs require more than 124 credit hours, citing special education as an example. He also said students often change their major, which may add extra semesters to complete the new requirements.

Availability of courses is keeping Honor junior Stuart Jeannot on campus at least an additional semester, he said.

“I worked hard to mold all of my class scheduling together,” Jeannot said. “It’s nice to take (time in college slow), but it would have been nice to graduate on time.”

Shawn Wilson, director of Student Retention, said most students take 12 to 15 credit hours a semester, which results in more time spent on campus.

Switching majors or financial difficulties also may result in additional time on campus, he said.

“(The biggest factor) comes down to the individual student,” Wilson said. “You need to know what you’re going to do and stick to your plan.”

A major focus of student retention is making sure students stay engaged, whatever that means for any one individual student, Wilson said.

“We need to be in tune to what our students ask for and respond appropriately,” he said. “I think from the institutional side of things, the things we need to be doing are making sure students have a seamless transition coming into the university and as seamless of a journey they can have.”

Wilson said there are several resources available for students looking for guidance or experiencing difficulties, including the offices of Career Services, Study Abroad, Scholarships and Financial Aid and Academic Advising.

Shapiro said CMU’s graduation rates are comparable to other universities with similar admission standards.

According to data from Western Michigan University, WMU graduates 52.2 percent of students after six years based on students who entered in 2004; the same year, CMU graduated 54.2 percent of students in the same amount of time. WMU does not provide seven-year figures.

“We are similar to Western Michigan, based on statistical analysis of our predicted graduation rates,” Shapiro said, “but taking CMU’s student characteristics and other aspects, they create a predicted graduation rate (for students). Our actual rate is higher than our predicted rate.”

Universities that graduate and retain higher percentages of students in the four-year period also have more elite standards, Shapiro said, referencing Harvard, Duke and Northwestern universities. He said those universities also have fewer part-time and academically-challenged students.

“Our university has a lower four-year graduation rate relative (to those schools),” Shapiro said. “It is more common for people (at CMU) to graduate in 4.5 to five years.”

Shapiro said the university encourages academic advising and is working on increasing availability of classes to improve graduation rates.

“We are working very hard on that because certain areas don’t have enough spaces because of demand,” he said.

Before signing a major, students may go to Academic Advising and Assistance, an office that conducts orientation sessions and coordinates tutoring, said Michelle Howard, assistant dean and director of Academic Advising and Assistance.

Howard said a big part of her office’s responsibilities are organizing M.A.J.O.R. night, an event featuring departments across campus to help guide students toward finding their preferred program.

Howard said her office focuses on “orientation and pre-major advising.”

“The first thing we do is position advisers in locations extremely student oriented,” she said. “We have five … Student Success Centers and four of them are located in residence halls across campus.”

She said an important part of advising comes with involving faculty members.

“Once students declare a major or minor, they meet with a faculty member who is authorized to outline the requirements for the major and minor, and that step is required by 56 hours of earned credit,” Howard said.

This is mainly because they are graduating in about a week. While many Central Michigan University students are just hoping to make it through exam week alive, seniors face commencement and their first steps into the “real world.”

And for some graduating students, an uncertain job market has made that reality just as nerve-racking as finals.

“I’m a little excited and a little scared,” said Wheeler senior Tony Rhodes.

The unemployment rate for 2008-2009 graduates was lower than the overall state average, said Julia Sherlock, director of career services. State unemployment is “in the neighborhood of 12 to 14 percent,” she said, while only about 8 percent of CMU graduates are unemployed.

Rhodes will be graduating May 8 with a degree in Broadcasting and Cinematic Arts and has yet to land a full-time job. He said he has become more interested in computer science and Web design, his minor.

Rhodes may use his broadcasting skills for smaller, short-term freelance jobs.

“I still enjoy broadcast and working with audio, but the job market just isn’t as good,” Rhodes said. “Anything with technology I’m pretty passionate about.”

Rhodes hopes to find a job in mid-Michigan because he grew up between Midland and Mount Pleasant, and most of his family lives in the area. He said he is seeking a job in the information technology department at Consumers Energy, where his brother-in-law works.

He has also been applying to various jobs online and sending out resumes — a practice he plans to intensify this summer. In the meantime, he will continue working for CMU’s Office of Scholarships and Financial Aid where he has been employed for about three years.

“I’m going to miss the structure (of college), knowing assignments are due at a certain time and the familiarity of it,” Rhodes said. “I’m looking forward to being able to make more money and not having to live on ramen noodles.”

Dewitt senior Amanda Smith is in a similar situation. Smith will be graduating with a non-teaching English degree and she wants to become a librarian.

“I applied at the library here, but they hired internally so I didn’t get that one,” Smith said.

Instead, she will be working this summer at a health club.

Career Services

Because librarian jobs are scarce, Smith said she is currently looking at anything in an office — administrative assistants, secretaries and similar positions.

She has been utilizing Michigan Talent Bank and CareerBuilder.com for her job search. She has also applied for several positions at the Michigan State University Bookstore.

Rhodes said he did not use the career services office at all in his job search and Smith said she used it “very sparingly.”

“Students need to tap into the resources they paid for here,” Sherlock said. “They should meet with an adviser. That’s the best first step you can take.”

Smith said she started to become very unsure of her future career endeavors last fall and visited the office for help with her resume.

Rhodes said the broadcasting program had a one-credit senior seminar to help students set up their resumes and cover letters.

Sherlock said new graduates are more appealing to employers because they have a marketable set of skills, especially in technology. They do not cost as much to hire as more experienced employees and can also relocate more easily.

Rhodes said if he could do things differently, he would not have waited to start his job search until his last semester at CMU.

“Do as many internships as you can,” he said. “They get you used to the professional environment and help you network.”

Smith stressed the importance of paying off student loans early. She said her $30,000 debt wouldn’t be as bad if she had not waited so long.

In addition, dressing appropriately for interviews is a must, she said.

“Invest in a good pair of shoes,” she said. “If you’re rocking a killer pair of heels, you’ll feel better about yourself.”

The caps and gowns this year are made of 100 percent recyclable water bottles, said Director of Public Relations Steve Smith.

If it rains, ponchos will be available for use during the 2 p.m. Commencement Ceremony in Kelly/Shorts Stadium.

“Rain or shine, it will be outside,” said Mary Jane Flanagan, executive assistant to the president. “As a precaution, we have ordered clear plastic ponchos that graduates can wear over their robes.”

Based on past ceremonies, Flanagan said she is expecting about 1,800 to 2,200 graduates for the Saturday ceremony, but will not be certain until that day.

There will be seating available for about 800 to 1,000 people in the Indoor Athletic Complex with a TV feed to watch the ceremony, Flanagan said. It will be on a first come, first serve basis.

There will also be a live stream of the ceremony available for people to view.

“I feel like there should be some sort of accommodation. It’s kind of a big day for everybody,” said Nicole Warren. “We are just all crossing our fingers and hoping it doesn’t (rain).”

The Port Huron senior said she will probably walk even in bad weather, because she has many family members who will be in attendance. However, she is displeased Central Michigan University officials did not have a better backup plan, she said.

Sharon Russell, commencement coordinator, said the weather will be monitored for commencement.

“Our team will take in consideration the weather,” she said.

Russell estimates the ceremony will last about three hours and hopes everyone will be respectful and stay the entire time.

Graduates must meet at the turf bay in the IAC by no later than 1 p.m. on May 8 to receive their name cards and line up by degree type.

As of Thursday, weatherchannel.com’s 10-day forecast indicated a high of 68 degrees and sunny weather for May 8.

Plymouth senior Lisa Yount said she believes some graduates will not want to attend commencement if it is raining, but since she has family coming from all different areas, she will unless there is a thunderstorm.

“It’s not going to be fun, but I still have to do it,” she said.

Flanagan wants students to remember they will be walking on turf.

“Wear comfortable shoes,” she said. “Fashion’s important, but hopefully comfort will rule this one.”

For information on the May 8 lineup for bachelor, graduate and specialist degrees, as well as the May 7 ceremony for doctorate degrees, visit http://cmich.edu/commencement. There are also directions provided for the live stream.

Yet, even after five years, it is so difficult to believe it’s all about to end.

Next week, I will join a few thousand others at Kelly/Shorts Stadium in donning the black cap and gown as a tired but proud graduate of this university.

Just a few weeks ago, I handed in my application to work at CM Life, then sent an e-mail to then-editor Chad Livengood, now a political reporter at the Springfield News-Leader in Missouri, telling him I am dedicated to making his newspaper better.

And when I say ‘a few weeks,’ I mean four-and-a-half years.

But it sure doesn’t seem that long ago.

A time of change

Since fall 2005, two residence halls were built, the football team won three Mid-American Conference championships, a medical college was approved and tuition increased 57.7 percent.

That last item is particularly striking to me.

I was among the first students to receive the CMU Promise’s fixed tuition guarantee for my entire college stay. But because the state went deeper into recession and the university could only raise tuition for freshmen, CMU turned into one of the most expensive of Michigan’s 15 public universities.

I chose this place mostly for its cheap tuition (at the time). And I’m not the only one.

Now it costs $339 per credit hour, plus the inevitable July increase for 2010-11 students, to take classes here. Combine that with department cuts and wear and tear of the facilities, and you have what realistically is a devalued college experience.

Central Michigan Life, thankfully, helped pad my résumé in ways a classroom never would have. But most students don’t have the opportunity of gaining work experience across the hall. Most have to maintain Summa Cum Laude grades and cross their fingers to get a call back from an internship coordinator.

This is why I worry greatly for this university. It needs to keep its eyes wide and its money closer to the chest. Building a $25-million medical college, to me, is a slap in the face to other prestigious programs on campus that desperately need money to move forward.

goodbye to the community

Almost every day, I hear a CMU student criticize Mount Pleasant — not enough places to shop. No big attractions. It’s in the middle of nowhere.

Let’s face it — Mount Pleasant is not an ideal career destination for most, unless you’re good at dealing cards or serving drinks. But to say any of that is looking at the city in the wrong context.

The true beauty of attending college is crashing into people from all walks of life and making connections you never dreamed possible. Besides — it’s easy to call a town of 23,000 boring on an idle Monday night, but there are a ton of well-kept secrets here, if you look for them.

To every professor, student, adviser and colleague I’ve come in contact with the last five years — thank you.

I may be turning to a new page in my life, but I certainly won’t forget this one.