Speaking in gender
CMU students, staff push to recognize proper personal pronouns
Ask someone on the street what a pronoun is, and they may or may not be able to tell you. Even less familiar would be the concept of “personal pronouns.”
Personal pronouns can be defined as pronouns that refer to a particular person, group or thing.
So, pronouns can include “she, her, her’s,” or “he, him, his,” but they also may include “ze,” or “hir,” among others.
Shannon Jolliff-Dettore, director of LGBTQ Services here at Central Michigan University, put it this way.
Use your words wisely
By Sydney Smith
Assistant Student Life Editor
Lake Orion junior Andie Roll has always been accepting of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer community, though she knew it would take more than just having an open mind.
"I am supportive of all sexualities and I've educated myself on ones that are not as well-known," she said. "I make sure I am politically correct when it comes to someone else's sexuality and just about what it means to be an ally to the LGBTQ community."
While it is more of an effort to educate oneself on things that are not familiar, in an ever-changing society of some forward-thinking people, becoming an ally makes individuals feel more accepted in a world where they sometimes aren't.
One simple way of becoming more of an ally is to eliminate words from your vocabulary that are used offensively against groups of people.
"The first and most simple thing is to stop using derogatory words and cutting out the phrase 'that's so gay,'" Holland junior Samm Grubbs said. "These are not insults and terms to use when you think something isn't fun or cool."
Along with educating yourself and cutting out offensive words and phrases, members of the LGBTQ community and allies say it's important to remember that as an ally, you will never fully understand others' experiences, so listening to these experiences is imperative.
"It's important for allies to the LGBTQ community to recognize that having good intentions isn't always the same as knowing the right thing to do," Mount Pleasant junior Noelle Goffnett said. "It's vital that in recognizing you aren't an in-member of the community, you must also acknowledge that there are things you cannot always be fully cognizant of."
“Pronouns are not a visible thing. They are a very personal thing,” she said. “You cannot look at someone and say, ‘their pronouns are, she, her, hers, or he, him, his.’ It is a very important personal identity.”
In a presentation made to CMU resident assistants and multicultural assistants called “No T All Shade,” Jolliff-Dettore stressed the importance of making residence halls and campus programming trans inclusive, and working toward making personal pronouns a part of everyday conversation.
Jolliff-Dettore also explained that one’s pronouns should be called “personal pronouns,” or simply “pronouns,” and not “preferred pronouns.”
Referring to personal pronouns as preferred pronouns indicates a choice on the part of the individual, and this is simply not the case.
“Using preferred pronouns suggests that the identity of being trans is a choice, so people try not to use that term,” Jolliff-Dettore explained.
In general, Jolliff-Dettore feels the idea and importance of personal pronouns is something the majority of people are unfamiliar with, but she also sees a growing movement to stress their importance.
“I don’t think a lot of people understand why pronouns are important and why asking about someone’s pronouns is important, but I think it is a new educational piece that a lot of folks campus-wide are trying to get on board with,” she said.
Kai Niezgoda, president of Transcend, a campus RSO dedicated to providing community resources and social support for trans and gender non-conforming individuals, said they feel people should be more aware of the need to be mindful of one’s personal pronouns.
“The easiest way to become more aware of personal pronouns would be self-educating on the basics, and being mindful and careful of the damages one can inflict with using pronouns improperly,” Niezgoda said. “We wouldn’t just go up to someone and assume their name, so we shouldn’t assume their pronouns.”
Above all else, Niezgoda made the point that personal pronouns should not just be an issue within the trans and gender non-conforming community. Everyone should make an effort to make their pronouns known.
“It is important to remember that pronouns apply to everyone,” Niezgoda said. “Never make assumptions about a person or their pronouns.”
Stephanie McNeill, a senior, said she could understand where people may not be mindful about a person’s pronouns.
“People are very quick to judge a book by its cover,” she said. “If people see that at birth you were a boy they’re going to refer to you as a ‘he,’ when this may not be the case.”
