Lessons in love: How to give advice, get a date
Dear Hilary,
All my roommate ever talks about is guys she likes. I’d be fine with that except she’s gone through, like, 50 guys this year. I don’t care about her love life anymore. What should I do? —Annoyed Roommate
Dear Annoyed, I think everyone has friends like these — myself included. Sometimes, I am probably this girl! It is completely normal for some of us to be “boy crazy” (or girl crazy), but it sounds like she’s taking it a little too seriously. As always, the best way to handle something is to look at it from her perspective. It is not uncommon for some people to base their esteem on the attention from others; she may do this. Either way, being honest and telling her your thoughts could help.
Dear Hilary, In high school, I was a really social person and I dated a lot. I am a sophomore now and I spend most of my time concentrating on my grades. I have great grades, but not much of a social life and I feel like when I approach girls now, they are not interested. Do you have any tips? —Awkward Date
Dear Awkward Date, Since you seem to be very academic, start honing social skills in your classes. Class can be a very non-threatening way to begin conversations, as everyone is stuck there for the hour anyway. Take the time to talk to a few people around you, just small talk at first, and see if anything clicks. Check out the Registered Student Organizations at CMU as well. You will meet people with similar interests this way and, although your focus should be on having fun and meeting new people, you may meet someone special.
Dear Hilary, I am a senior about to graduate and I am looking for jobs out of state. I have an offer in Pennsylvania, but I am terrified because if I take it I am leaving my friends, my boyfriend, my family and everyone that matters to me. I don’t know anyone where I would move and I don’t know what to do. I really like the job, but I’m nervous. —Scared for the Next Step
Dear Scared, First of all, congratulations on graduating and on what sounds like a successful job hunt! With that however, the “next step” is always difficult. A good way to look at this is to construct a pros-and-cons sheet. Write down what you like about this new position, as well as the negatives of taking it. It sound like staying close to family and friends is very important to you. While you are working through your thoughts, try to expand your job search to closer markets. If you do choose to take the job, get involved with the community. Volunteering for local events and groups is a good way to meet new people.
If you have a question for next week's advice column, contact Hilary at Farre1hl@cmich.edu or anonymously at formspring.me/HilaryFarrell.
