Tom, Jason Borrelli wrestle with father-son relationship
Chris McCarty
Just as hard is being the father of a top young Division I wrestler.
This situation is what CMU’s Tom and Jason Borrelli have to deal with on a daily basis.
When Jason won his first of two state high school titles while wrestling for Mount Pleasant High School, his coach thought it would be a nice touch if Tom gave his son the state-title medal.
Unfortunately, with Tom also being Head Coach Tom Borrelli ,this was an NCAA violation.
“Jason wanted me to do it. His coach asked me to do it and I said no, and he asked me again and told me he thought it would be good and it ended up being a big deal,” said Tom Borrelli.
Something this simple and common was made complicated purely because of who the two are.
“That really frustrated me, because my Dad couldn’t just be my dad for a day,” said Jason Borrelli.
“When people ask me which of my two state titles is more important, I always say the first, because it was my dad presenting it. That will be something I will remember forever.”
Of course, it is not all trials and tribulations for the 1998 National Wrestling Coaches Association Coach of the Year and the 24-8 overall (4-0 Mid-American Conference) freshman.
Where most athletes never get to share the relationship of coach/athlete with their father; the Borrellis embrace it.
“It’s fun to get to see him compete. I didn’t get to see him compete in high school as much as I would have liked to and now I get to see every one of his matches,” said Tom Borrelli.
While the relationship does offer some benefits when it is at a level as high as the Chippewas wrestling program, it can be taxing and create awkward situations and feelings.
“At the beginning of the year, I noticed myself getting nervous while he (Jason) was getting ready to wrestle,” Tom Borrelli said.
“It was a different type of nervous than when our team was getting ready to wrestle. I was wanting him to do well.”
The life long bond between the two creates a unique environment.
The father knows the son so well that the coach knows exactly what the athlete is capable of.
“He knows exactly how to push me; he knows how to get at me,” said Jason Borrelli.
“He can be harder on me because he answers to himself. He doesn’t have to go home and wonder what the kid is saying to his parents.”
The son knows the father so well that the athlete knows exactly what the coach requires.
“He (Jason) knows what I expect more than the other guys. He understands my moods and my feelings more. Him and I think a lot alike,” said Tom Borrelli.
“But I have to make sure that I don’t treat him too much different then I treat the other guys. I have to make sure I’m not treating him more unfairly, expecting more out of him than the other guys,” said Tom Borrelli.
On Jason’s way to success he has needed the guidance of his coach and father.
Jason had wrestled at 133 pounds in high school and had to make the transition to 125 pounds for the college level.
“That’s the biggest challenge that I’ve been involved in since I’ve been in sports,” said Jason Borrelli.
“The extra workouts and the diet to maintain the weight has been really tough on my body.”
Despite these challenges, Jason has had unexpected success in his first season of collegiate wrestling.
In his first taste of wrestling for the Chippewas, Jason won his weight class at the Michigan State Open.
“It (success) makes it a little harder on me and him; it raises the level of expectations. Sometimes you wish instead of people expecting so much of him it was the other way around. It’s easier to be successful,” said Tom Borrelli.
Jason has only the highest of goals for himself.
“I got involved in wrestling to be the best at my weight class. So I guess my goal would be to be national champion,” said Jason Borrelli.
“I wouldn’t have gotten involved in this or put myself through the things I have except to be the best.”
Jason’s father prefers to keep the goals he has for his son on a more long-term and personal level.
“My long-term expectations for him (Jason) is to gain as much in the sport as possible along the lines of life skills in terms of inner-strength –– to gain as much from the sport as possible,” said Tom Borrelli.
Perhaps it is goals like these and expectations this high that make it hard for others to allow Tom and Jason to be just father and son.
