Don't waste your time
I nearly won a fancy cell phone the other day. Not really, but it was fun to pretend for a second.
An online pop-up ad blinked at me all of a sudden. "Win a Free Blackberry." Obvious ad bait, but why not try, just once?
First, I had to "kick" a soccer ball past a virtual goalie. After seven misses, I was redirected to a flashy site that made it clear this was Gadget City: my "source for free Blackberrys."
I really want a Blackberry. They gleam with technological cool. I've often wondered if every call placed on such a phone would be perfect.
The box to enter my e-mail address flashed at me provocatively. My fingers hovered over the keyboard .
Wait. Read the fine print. "Receipt of gift requires ... completion of user surveys ..."
Ugh. I hate surveys. And entering my e-mail means committing Spamicide. But I have a dummy address set up for forms like this. OK.
"Congratulations! Claim your free gift!" Sweeet. I was asked to hurry because the offer was for a "limited time only."
Enter your mailing address (for shipping the Blackberry). Wish I had a dummy one of those. I entered my parents address (sorry, Dad).
Survey time! More free offers than I could count. Do I have belly fat? Get the No Diet Dieter's Handbook! Sign up for Vonage! Become a paralegal, a dental hygienist or a geneticist. I clicked 'no' on all.
OK, next?
Another survey. Grumble. Actually, the same one, just formatted differently. I clicked 'yes' on the "send me free cigarettes" offer. I'm not a frequent smoker, but the game was starting to stress me. OK, next?
Another survey. Grrr - wait! An option to skip! Next.
Another survey. No option to skip. I clicked 'no' and 'yes' randomly. Next.
Another survey, for "Scholar's Avenue," asking if I'd like to get a degree with a leading university? Sure. Two options here: have an admissions representative contact me or skip on to the free promotion.
Duh.
I was pretty tired of the game at this point, but I felt the end was near as I finally clicked the button called "submit."
"HTTP Status 404 - /path/
Type: Status Report
Message: /path/
Description: the requested path is unavailable."
A dead end!! Arrgh!
I frantically clicked the back button and tried again. Same result. I tried backing up again and choosing the other answer to the last question. Nope, still the dead end. They got me. No Blackberry for Garret.
Moral: ignore the flashy offers. Your time isn't free, so don't waste it.
Oh, and I see I have some offers for herbal Viagra in my inbox. Swell.
