Column: It's more than alphabet soup
Sometimes, I feel like people think that LGBT stands for Lesbian Gay Bacon and Tomato at the rate that society forgets about bisexuals and transgender individuals.
As someone who identifies as bisexual, I understand there are struggles gay and lesbian individuals will face that I might not. If I am in a relationship with a man, we will pass as a heterosexual couple. We won’t get slurs hurled our way or discriminated against by being refused service.
It’s not ideal, being presumed straight when I’m not, but I understand the kind of unspoken privilege that comes with being bisexual and in a relationship with a cisgender male.
Similarly, there are things trans folk will go through that cisgender LGB people will never get: The misgendering, the transphobic punch lines to jokes, the higher hate crime mortality rate of trans identifying individuals than cisgender identifying people — the list goes on.
But here’s the thing: even if bisexual and transgender people aren’t the face of the LGBT community, we’re still here. We exist. And we deserve just as much support and love as everyone else within the community.
A lot of the time, it feels like we're being left out. I've gone to pride event with LGBT friends and been asked if I’m “just there for support” or being told “straight people like me” can’t participate, or watching as my closeted trans friends are asked if they’re “really trans” because they "don’t look like it.”
I’m not saying gay and lesbian individuals are just blindly accepted in society because same-sex marriage is finally legalized across all 50 states. That would be utterly absurd. What I’m asking is that we stop assuming that gender and sexuality is a simple black and white issue.
The next time you see a couple together, don’t just blindly assume that they’re both straight or cisgender. As silly as it sounds, until you know, you don’t know. Ask. Ask for preferred pronouns when addressing someone, just like how you’d ask their name.
Obviously sexuality is a bit trickier, as sometimes people aren’t comfortable with just outright stating, but be mindful. The guy who has the smokin’ hot girlfriend in the front row of your history class could be bisexual. Him dating a girl doesn’t make his bisexuality a phase or make it any less real.
“But Jordyn,” you say. “That seems like a lot of work and I don’t want to do that. There’s way more straight people than LGBT people in the world so it’s way easier to just assume.”
We all know the old cliché about how assumptions make an ass out of the both of us. Let’s try our hardest to avoid that.
With this month being Coming Out Week/Month, I want people to understand there is more than just the L and the G in the acronym. It’s time to make everyone in the community feel safe and included.
